Archive for June, 2010


June 30, 2010

Fuck you, Wimbledon.


More Benneteau. No, really.

June 27, 2010

So I was just casually looking for tennis photos on Flickr, and I came across Carine06, who apparently was standing next to Rachael for the entire duration of Queens this year, so it would seem.
Nothing to say in this post, just photos. Glorious photos.

Discussing some serious dubs chat. Or perhaps where to go for dinner later.

Did you realise Jules had a jawline?

That's the makings of a Wimbledon finalist right there, can't you tell?

Is he looking at a tennis ball or a football? Does anyone care?

Ah, a football.

Nice stance. That's somebody who's READY.

No words.

Giving the umpire a talking to? Probably not, perhaps just discussing the weather. It's fierce mild.


Clearly his seduction face for Llods.

Cute isn't even the word.

Carine06 on Flickr:
Thankyou, sincerely.
All of her photos are protected by copyright, please ask permission before using them elsewhere!

Mo in the Sunday Times.

June 27, 2010

Oh how I giggled.


Second week, BOOM!

June 27, 2010

Just a celebratory post for Andy Roddick and Julien Benneteau for getting into the second week of Wimbledon. If Roddick didn’t, I’d be in the foetal position on my living room floor right now, we sort of expected him to. But Jules, oh man am I proud. Well done, Benny, didn’t even take you five sets this time, always a bonus.

Roddick, just chillin'. On the ground.

He won. Well done, sincerely.

Oh my.

10 Things To Do With Middle Sunday.

June 27, 2010

1. Stream every single match from the past six days, one after the other, no breaks inbetween. Or alternatively, watch the Isner/Mahut match again.

2. Go to your local park, chill out, have a good time. Fall over and injure your leg, then just START SPITTING ON EVERYONE. RRAAAAHHHHHH!
nb: must have spare $15,000

3. Make a pot of tea, get some snacks and rent out American Pie, Evolution, Dukes of Hazzard and Road Trip. Don’t worry, the real Roddick will be back soon.

4. Sleep.

5. Get a bus down to SW19 and kidnap all remaining Gentlemen’s Singles players bar Roddick and Benneteau, thus defaulting a Roddick/Benneteau final, and getting rid of Federer and Murray to boot.
nb: ignore if not previously thoroughly planned.

6. Have a sitting contest against MoLay.
You need; water, a chair, a timer and a goddamn adorable voice.
You are not allowed; toilet breaks, any form of changing entertainment. television is allowed, remotes are not. NOT EVEN IN THE ADVERTS.
Don’t even pretend you could do it. Ignore #6.

7. Look at Colin Fleming’s face. Yeah, for 24 hours.

8. Watch the incredible 2008 Wimbledon Men’s Final, Nadal vs. Federer, on ESPN Classic at 7.25pm. Mind that time Federer lost? Ahhh memories.

9. Go to your local tennis court with a mate and break Isner/Mahut’s longest match record, just for shits and giggles.

10. Cry. Cry, and wait.

Andy Roddick.

June 25, 2010

I was nervous about today, Kohls has always been a threat to me in terms of being an opponent of Andy after a fateful Australian Open match that made me against Kohls fo’ life. Although, I do absolutely adore his serve. It is ridiculous.

I know I come across as somebody who likes players only for their looks. For the most case, yes, that is true. But Andy Roddick is different. He’s the reason I follow tennis, he’s the only player who’s progression I truly care about. And I mean really care, some may say too much. After two years of watching almost every ATP tournament, streamed online, on TV, anywhere, I completely stopped altogether after Wimbledon 2009. It was too much.

That being said, I can’t help the fact that the boy has a fabulous booty.

Andy's got back.

Like two Pringles hugging.

Actual curvature. I stared at this one for longer than most.

Andy's got actual back and shoulders, too.

With added trademark Andy side tongue.

It's really quite... defined.

Andy's got front.


Tennis is the ultimate spectator sport.

We liked Isner before you did.

June 25, 2010

I just had to let this out. Rachael especially, liked Isner way before that match. And all this Mohamed Layhani love? Bitch please, who do you think this blog is NAMED AFTER?

Perhaps I’m just angry because at around 68 games all, or 68-69, I thought to myself ‘jeez, I need a cigarette, this is going to go on forever. will just go now.’
As I walked back into my flat, I could hear the cheering coming from my living room and Isner’s smile lighting up my television.
Yeah. That’s right. I missed it.

I'm dead small. Queen's Club 2008.

Rachael's a bit taller. Nipple height at least.

Can I also add, if this post sounds a bit bitter, I am half joking. Obviously so unbelievably pleased for John Isner and the amount of recognition and new fans he’ll have now is 100% deserved.

If you’re not already, follow him on Twitter @johnisnertennis.

The many faces of Julien Benneteau.

June 24, 2010

Bet you thought he only had one.

"This is my 'you want some, come and get it' face."

"This is my 'one day, this will all be mine...' face."

"This is my concentration face."

"This is my annoyed face."

"This is my scared face."

"This is my 'you wish you had a slave' face."

"This is my 'I know you're checkin' out my hot bod but I'm pretending I haven't noticed' face."

"This is my pleased face."

"This is my pensive face."

"This is my angry face. Grrrrrr."

"This is my 'have you seen how hot my brother is?' face."

"These are our 'we will FUCK YOU UP' faces."

"These are our 'BFF4EVAAAA!' faces."

Good day to be French.

June 23, 2010

I mean, not so much if you’re a football fan, so I’ve heard. But if you’re into tennis then you’re doing well.

I have to admit, today… I was bored. We were absolutely spoiled yesterday with exciting five setters and the near upset of Federer. Today was exactly what you would expect from the second day at SW19.

Today was an epic display of why I, now, brace yourselves, this is brand new shocking information, absolutely adore Julien Benneteau.

Ok the photo totally squashed, but WHAT IT SAYS IS, that Jules painfully lost the first two sets, and I accepted defeat. But wait, he WON the next two? Oh Benny, that’s what I like to see, now just do that one more time and we’re sorted. Oh, hold on a second, yeah okay, just get broken. No really man that’s cool, at 2-4 down, you’ve got this in the bag. No, you don’t, you’ve lost it, you FOOL. Oh wait, you broke back? Ok, cheers mate. Oh, nice hold. Hold on, another break? Um, and a hold to love to win the match?
Oh Benny, stop being such a tease.

No seriously dude, stop it.

 Bad news of the day was losing both Blake AND Bagdhatis. Baghdatis. I can never remember the order of the h’s and d’s and stuff in his name. Whatevz.
Good news of tomorrow is that Andy Roddick is on Centre Court and defending “champion”, Roger Federer, is on Court 1. Fantastic. He plays Llodra at 1pm, so quite frankly, I am excited. I can’t even remember who else is playing tomorrow, it’s all about Roddick.

Oh and the French thing was also because super sexy Jeremy Chardy also advanced today, as did Tsonga. Wait, did he? I think he did. I am a terrible tennis fan.

Tennis perfection. Sort of. Not really though.

Not gremlin-y at all.

I do love a good approach shot.

June 21, 2010

Well the day started off well, with my ever so sweet mother bringing me strawberries and cream and there being a little bit of wine left in my fridge.

I thought to myself what I’m sure everybody thought to themselves this morning.
Quick straight setter from Fed, then hellooo Roddick.
You thought that, right? Wrong.
Alejandro Falla gave me an excruciating glimpse at what could have been the greatest, most wonderful, most unbelievable start to a Wimbledon Championships in a very long time. Definitely in my lifetime, at least. Or my tennis lifetime, at very least. A long time anyway, you get the picture.
I got very overexcited, very stressed and a little bit drunk, but Falla, as impressive as he was today, couldn’t make the points against Federer when it mattered most (remind you of anybody…?) and despite originally being two sets to love down, Federer took the set in five. Uncool, R-Fedz*, uncool.

Daaaang, son.

The Roddick match was much less terrifying, and the boy won in straight sets against fellow American Rajeev Ram. Commentators were Andrew Castle and John Lloyd, and this brought something to my attention. Some people seem to have a problem with Castle. Why? What did he do that I missed? His impression of Steve Ulrich (often confused with Lars Ulrich, drummer of Metallica) was beautiful, I’ve always wanted to do one but you can’t do it in type, it’s all in the tone.

“Ram challenges the call…”
“Bitch please, don’t question me.”

“Gaaaaame, Roooddick”
“Gaaaaame, Roooddick, obbbbviously”

And it really was obvious. The match basically consisted of Ram sighing and Roddick strutting back to the baseline before the return ball even lands back on the court, emphasising how completely pathetic it would be to even consider that the ball would be in when it does land.

He next faces another favourite of mine, Llodra. But I swear to god, if he even takes a set off Roddick, he’s going down.


Robert Kendrick vs. Jo Wilfried Tsonga
I haven’t seen the Frenchie in a very long time, I hope I still adore him. I’m pretty sure I will.

Gilles Simon vs. Guillermo Alcaide
I have indeed seen this Frenchie recently, and I do indeed still adore him.

Kristof Vliegen vs. JULIEN BENNETEAU
On an infuriatingly untelevised court. I will be watching the scores without blinking. He has to win, he has to get on TV, I must watch at least ONE of his matches. Came so goddamn close at Wimbledon. Well, no, I didn’t, since I missed the doubles due to a family barbecue, but whatever. It’s the principle.

Hi, I’m Christina and I love the French.

*Credit to my friend Emma for coming up with R-Fedz.